Melinda Wilson

Nothing was more important to Melinda Ledbetter Wilson than family.

So, when she unexpectedly passed away on January 30, 2024, the sadness in the Wilson home on Clerendon Road was instantaneous and enormous. And as the news was shared, that sadness spread like an atmospheric river.

That’s what we all feel when a spouse dies, when a parent dies, when a beloved aunt dies. When our closest friend is suddenly gone. Nothing will ever be the same. And that’s true.

But in the case of Melinda Wilson, she was so many things to so many people that the void she left is massive, truly unfillable. In large part, that’s because of what she meant to Brian Wilson, one of music’s most beloved legends. Grief from the news of her sudden passing would quickly encircle the globe, touching his fans everywhere.

However, today, we’re here with family and friends to honor the memory of the person.

Melinda Kae Ledbetter was born October 3, 1946, in Pueblo, Colorado, the younger of two daughters. Her father, Ray, was an Air Force pilot who would become a successful businessman; her mother, Rose, was a homemaker. Melinda and her older sister Marsha grew up in Whittier. Marsha was her best friend.

Melinda and her mother shared a passion for Native American culture, especially art and jewelry. Rose never stopped being a strong force in Melinda’s life. Melinda remained devoted to them all forever.

But what was Melinda like before almost any of us here today knew her? Cousin Nancy Lemmon remembers that Marsha was quiet, but Melinda was the opposite: even in 1966, she was “opinionated and feisty.” And when the Ledbetters came to visit family in Pueblo, Nancy recalls that Melinda “liked to parade around the swimming pool. Liked being a California Girl.” Ironic in that thirty years later, she would marry the man who composed that Beach Boys classic.

After high school, Melinda’s career in modeling took her far from her Whittier roots; she was a hard-working model, especially for Mr. Blackwell. Then, as that career began to wind down, she started another. She’d always loved cool cars and owned them (yes, she had a T-Bird, but later on a Porsche, too), so selling them was a natural transition.

In the modeling world, she’d seen herself as a commodity. Now, she would use her easy laugh, natural beauty, and her killer instinct in a different kind of showroom. It worked. Melinda was a top salesperson, first at Lou Ehlers and then at Martin Cadillac.

At forty, Mel seemingly had settled into an L.A. life. She had boyfriends, but not a special one. Truthfully, she never lived alone. There were always lots of four-legged friends. And birds.

Her daily commute down Pacific Coast Highway from her Malibu home to the corner of Bundy and Olympic Boulevard was her life until one day when it was turned upside down, not by an earthquake but the guy...where her world and the world of music was going to change in ways nobody could ever have imagined.

It was 1986. A customer walked into Martin Cadillac to buy a car. Melinda didn’t know who he was. Sure, she liked the Beach Boys, but she thought Dennis was the cute one. But the car buyer that day was Brian Wilson, and that was the beginning of one of the most dramatic relationships imaginable.

Recalling the sale she made that day, Melinda would laughingly say, “I laid him away.” Car sales lingo. There was no bargaining. The guy paid full sticker price.

However, there was something about him. Everybody who really knows Brian would say that. So, when he asked her out on a date, she said “Yes,” and they began to date regularly. Exclusively.

But when Melinda began to question what was really going on in Brian’s life, this so-called doctor cut her off. He had complete control. Or so he thought. He had never encountered the kind of relentless determination that Melinda Ledbetter had. Her focus was on what this man was doing to Brian. Because she knew it wasn’t right.

Later on, she would be described as an unstoppable force. When it came to getting rid of the so-called doctor, she was just that. Melinda didn’t lose. And Brian was freed. Mission accomplished.

A few years later, Brian and Melinda bumped into each other and began dating again. As a couple, they were like the old song, “teenagers in love.”

On February 6, 1995, in a beautiful service at the Wayfarer’s Chapel on the Palos Verdes Peninsula – with family and friends there to celebrate the occasion – Brian and Melinda became man and wife.

Now, if you know Brian Wilson, this quote from Melinda will make sense:

“Music is his first love. Nothing can replace it. It's his being, it's his essence, it's his everything. So,

I'm settling for second, but it's a pretty good second.”

Melinda made herself invaluable in Brian’s music life. Her tenacity became especially evident in her unwavering support for Brian, guiding him through a series of personal and professional challenges as Brian came back from decades of darkness.

Brian didn’t want to tour. Melinda said, “Let’s try it.”

Brian didn’t think he could play Pet Sounds live. Melinda said, “Let’s try it.” Brian didn’t think he could finish SMiLE. Melinda said, “Let’s try it.”

Every day, Melinda was right there, encouraging Brian every step of the way. Melinda took immense pride with each step, big or small, as she helped Brian conquer every challenge, somehow finding a way to simultaneously be both a loving wife and a tough manager.

And with the confidence he regained, Brian could again find joy in his first love, music...and in turn give love to the woman who had made it all possible.

Before Brian and Melinda were married, the Music Industry didn’t know how to properly honor Brian. With Melinda by his side, he received almost every award imaginable. There was even a movie made about their most improbable romance...love and mercy, indeed.

But there was one more thing the Wilsons needed to do. There was one thing missing in their home, so they decided to adopt, and suddenly their house was filled with the laughter of Daria, Delanie, Dylan, Dash, and Dakota. Each one held a very special place in Melinda’s heart. Each child knows how much Melinda loves them.

With five kids, a dozen or so dogs, a legendary career to manage, Melinda always had a lot on her plate. She was a tireless champion for her husband…and the strong mother the kids all needed.

For nearly thirty years, she was the rock behind Brian and the Wilson family. Her legacy is the people in this room, here with us to honor her.

Each of them is truly here because of her. Brian.

Daria, Delanie, Dylan, Dash, and Dakota.

Her nephew Patrick and the Ledbettter family. The extended Wilson family.

And Gloria Ramos, forever a special member of the Brian Wilson family. Her best friends and trusted partners. Too many to list.

Not here today are those countless lives she touched all over the world who’ve lost their Facebook friend.

You see, wherever Melinda went, she created a family. There were a lot of families: her parents and her beloved sister. The family of models she worked with. The car showrooms. And in the past thirty years, she embraced the Brian Wilson fan world. She was a fan, too, and treated the fans as friends. They knew they had an ally with Melinda.

The loss of Melinda Wilson, a figure of immense warmth and strength, has left an irreplaceable void.

For her entire life, she was the Ledbettter woman who went out into the world and did great and unexpected things.

For nearly thirty years, Melinda was the heart of the Wilson family. Today, we remember her with love, knowing her heart lives on in Brian’s music, touching hearts forever. And it lives on in her children, who will carry forward her indomitable spirit.

Today, we celebrate the lifeforce that was Melinda Wilson.

– David Leaf

Hello. My name is David Leaf. I’m Daria Wilson’s godfather, and this is the story she asked me to tell you today.

There was nothing more important to Melinda than family.

Well, maybe dogs, but that’s a conversation for another day.

How did I become part of Melinda’s family?

Believe me, I wasn’t dating models. And the only car I ever bought was a Volvo.

We lived in two very different worlds.

I met her for the same reason so many of us are here… we all love the same man…Brian Wilson

I met Brian almost exactly ten years before Melinda did.

It was June of 1976 at the Westside YMCA on Sawtelle. I was shooting baskets with a friend from college.

Brian and his cousin Stan asked if we wanted to play two on two.

Stan had just retired from the NBA.

We didn’t have a chance. Except Brian played no “D.”

Absolutely no defense.

When he got the ball he shot it, immediately. And then lost interest.

Which will come as no surprise to those of you who know him.

Thirteen years later, almost to the day, Eva and I met Melinda Ledbetter.

The reason I remember the exact day is that for years, we had been working with the Attorney General’s office to get rid of the so called doctor who was controlling Brian’s life.

And Eva said, “If something doesn’t happen by June 1st, we have to stop.

On June 1, 1989, the telephone rang.

It was Melinda Ledbetter. She had gotten my number from Gary Usher.

She said Gary thought we could help. We invited her over to our apartment on 6th St. in Santa Monica, and she explained that she was worried about what this so-called doctor was doing to Brian.

So were we.

She just saw this very sweet guy being taken advantage of, and when she questioned what was going on, she was excommunicated.

Brian was no longer allowed to see her.

And so, for days, weeks, months, and years, Melinda, Eva, and I were in battle together.

We had some information. Melinda had some. We had spies everywhere.

It seems like every night, while Melinda and Eva sat on the couch and strategized, I was on the floor playing with Molly, Mel’s adorable Maltese. One of the best friends I ever had.

I was able to multi-task. And we knew what we had to do:

We had to convince Brian’s brother Carl that he had to act.

It was because of Melinda’s relentless push that Brian was finally freed from what he called “nine years in prison.”

Just a side note, when we met Melinda she was not a big Beach Boys fan. She had never heard Pet Sounds. Had never even heard of SMiLE.

She just didn’t think that what was happening to Brian was right.

There are those who wonder why Melinda is called Brian’s Savior.

She was. If not for Melinda...and Gloria Ramos too…Brian would have lived out his years under the control of this so-called doctor.

But, working together, we got him out of jail.

The 1990s were a fun time for us as couples. We would go out to eat together at least two or three times a week…and laugh a lot.

What did Melinda mean to Brian?

In 1995, when he was promoting the revealing Don Was documentary, I Just Wasn’t Made for These Times and the brilliant Van Dyke Parks album, Orange Crate Art, a reporter asked Brian why he felt comfortable stepping back into the spotlight.

His answer was simple but deep. “I have emotional security.” He could just as easily have said, “I’m married to Melinda.” Because she was the source of this emotional security.

And because of Melinda, Brian came back to the world…finally receiving all the honors he had always deserved. The Grammys, the Kennedy Center Honors, The Songwriters Hall of Fame. The All Star Tribute at Radio City. MusiCares. And so much more.

Brian was once like Melinda. Determined. In the past 30 years, Melinda took on that part of the music business for him because she was strong. Fearless. Relentless.

Without Melinda, the Wondermints wouldn’t have been part of his band.

Without Melinda, Brian wouldn’t have ever toured as a solo artist.

Without Melinda’s encouragement, Brian would never have played Pet Sounds live.

Without Melinda, Brian would never have given us his greatest gift, Brian Wilson Presents SMiLE.

That Lucky Ol’ Sun. The Gershwin album.

Each time, it was Melinda who stood behind Brian as he accomplished artistic feats that just wouldn’t have happened if she wasn’t there.

And because she always had his back, Brian was right there for the 50th anniversary reunion tour with the Beach Boys.

But Melinda had another idea. A big, big idea.

She and Brian had a huge house, and they wanted to fill it with kids who otherwise might not have had a chance.

And Melinda had so much love to give that meant there would be a lot of Wilson kids.

Eva and I are Daria’s godparents, and then came Delanie and Dylan and Dash and Dakota.

Melinda was a tough but loving mother.

And with Jean Sievers, she was a tough but loving manager.

But the key word is “loving.”

Unconditional love.

Brian felt it from the start. And the kids did too, even if they had their disagreements.

That’s what parents and children do.

Every time I talked to her in recent months, just before she passed, she was heartbroken that after all he had been through, Brian wasn’t well.

She said, “I can’t believe it.”

We know what she was talking about.

Life is like that.

But because of Melinda, he had thirty great years.

So, I think of that happy day back in 1995 when she and Brian got married. Carl was his best man. Marsha, Melinda’s older sister, her best friend, was her maid of honor. My wife was a bridesmaid. All gone now.

It’s so hard to believe.

Melinda was such a strong force that going to the house the day of her passing one could immediately feel her immense absence.

Melinda always wanted what was best for her family.

Nobody can fill her role.

That is the terrible loss we feel today.

And by feeling it, we honor the special person she was.

How special?

A few days ago I received a call with a message that I want to conclude with.

When I saw on my cell that I was getting a call from England, I thought, “That’s very expensive junk call.”

But I answered. And the voice at the other end of the phone said,

“Hello, David. It’s Elton.” As in Sir Elton John.

He wanted me to tell you all this because of what Brian and Melinda mean to him.

This is what he said:

“When Brian’s life was floundering at its lowest nadir, Melinda appeared and gave him love, family, and reassurance.

“She rescued him. She made my idol happy, the happiest he'd ever been.

“He came to life again and felt the love. She was a miracle.

“He is a miracle. I always considered him to be my inspiration.

He still is.

“Melinda made him and me feel the wonder of the human spirit.”

Sir Elton continued: "She was a miracle woman.”

Thank you, Sir Elton. All that’s left to say is ---

“We love you, Melinda.”